Another visit to the doctors …

So I went to the doctor again recently, you know, those check ups us ladies have to have. Fun ?

I can’t say it was anything too different than normal, scrubbed my vag before I went, made sure it was hairless, as per.

Sat in a doctors waiting room for an hour waiting to be seen.

Strangely I’d be assigned someone new?! Not a nurse, nor a lady. A male… a MALE.

We’re going over the usual questions:
How many sexual partners in the last six months? 1
Periods? regular
Protection ?  none ..
No pill? No
Do you use condoms? No *oh my god- how does a doctor asking you if you use Johnny’s make you feel like the worst human being ever”
So are you trying to get pregnant? no
So what do you do to protect yourself from getting pregnant- Anal but sometimes he just pulls out or I’ll just give him head ?

Apparently I’ve been reassigned back to my old nurse ❤️

In other news; last years latex shoot went into another magazine

Thanks Guys

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Clothed female- naked male ?

Did I ever tell you about the time I walked into a porno… and had to see it through!

So a few years ago, back in the day, little old me received an email from this particular person asking if I would be interested in coming along to a video shoot.
I hardly ever had emails come directly to me, it was usually through my work accounts or something like that, so a little skeptical, I replied asking for more details as I wasn’t really too sure what was being offered, and the pay was … quite good!
So the response basically calmed my nerves, he offered me to bring a friend! GREAT! Can’t be anything dodgy going on here ….. ?
He specifically said no adult, I will not be participating in anything adult… ??
He even sent me some links…. do you think I took the time to look at them….naa of course I didn’t ?

So I toodle along on the day and am welcomed by this lovely guy, walk into the studio….. 4 other girls are there and 4 other guys …. hmmm

Seems legit.

“Can you sign all this please Jodie, release forms etc” standard

“What would you like me to wear”
“Nothing to revealing but sexy, maybe a dress or something”

Dressed I get…

“Okay girls through to the studio we go…”

“Girls if you 4 sit on the sofa there, Beth you sit there”

“Now, were going to go through the script in stills first and then the video. This will make it easier for everyone to know the script and what will be happening at what time”

“We’ve got two videos to do today, should wrap up in about 2 hours tops”

?Did he just say two hours? I’ve literally just been paid a weeks wage for two hours work… ??? ?? see this, these are fucking alarm bells!

So we start with the script, shooting in stills.
Story line for this first script ‘girls night in’
We’ve been invited round Beth’s for a few drinks, she’s got a little game for us, the game is called cock betting…
?
?owww bringing a bit of a Far East culture into a little video were doing! Great! Who’s putting on Prince or Persia? Although I’m sure it’s been banned in the United Kingdom since the 19th Century?

*Enters two men, naked, bounded and gagged* ?

Definitely not what I expected to see, two stonking dicks points to the fucking ceiling. Let me just clarify this, this was not the cock betting I thought it was, there were no roosters … well their flappy ball bags hung like a roosters neck… so I guess that’s where the resemblance is….

?WTF have I got myself into,
Why the fuck are there two naked men in front of me,
Why the fuck have they got boners and why the fuck is no one else surprised* act cool Jode, you got this … not literally, well I hope I Fucking don’t.

So the story continues…

“you’ll be betting on which man will cum first”

?cum first? These fuckers have pre-cum dripping from their fucking knobs, hang on, how are they cumming?

“The betting will start when the two girls start giving them a hand job, the one that cums first loses”

?Does he? Does he really? Wait! What two girls?
“The guy who’s last will then have a bet to see if he can last having a blow job… firstly from one girl and then both girls will suck him off”

?WHAT GIRLS!

Well anyways turns out it was the two girls sitting next to me that would be getting smashed all over the place.

Now I can sit back and just watch the action, you’d think that was the case anyways.

“Cut!” “Monkey face!” “POV” “chocking”

I’ve never been so bored watching porn…

“Money shot”

????? Spunk all over the carpet…

?who the fuck cleans that up? Who actually cleans up after all this?

?I think a little spunk hit my leg, do I wipe it off, do I leave it. Do I make him lick it off. I’m just about ready to have a mental break down…

Anyways check out cfnm.com for the full video ??

Enjoy Wankers

Rape Role Play?

Can anybody else relate to this?
I sometimes look at people and seem to analyse their sex life by how they look… In themselves and at one another…

Im doing it a hell of alot recently specially with couples. Most of my friends are in relationships and we tend to talk about our sex lives (being girls everything inch is spoken about, literally) now I’ve always know the limits with them. I know after dropping a few bombs on them with my sex life I can’t exactly tell them everything because they just don’t get it. But I actually feel like I have some magical sex life detector in my brain ?
I saw my friend and her bf the other and ( I don’t know who else does this) my first reaction was, “there is no way she lets him do…. well anything” and obviously speaking to her in general and the girly chats there is literally no sex life there…
it’s not just them it’s everyone I seem to look at, at the moment. I just seem to see these two sexual characters in front of me… instead of people…. I just see their sex life.. and honestly, I clearly need new friends ?

I’m wondering how many people out there settle in relationships and never really fulfil their fantasies. Which also brings me onto another question. Should fantasies stay fantasies or should they be explored?

Let’s throw a hypothetical out there:
Situation: Rape Role Play
A couple: the boy maybe the girl fantasies about this particular situation. Watches porn to this, and gets off to this.
The couple are comfortable enough to be able to tell each other about this fantasy and are happy to explore that with one another.
Personally I think that’s absolutely fantastic, they’re comfortable and safe with one another.
BUT this is a massive taboo in our culture.. why? Did I just bring up culture? Am I growing up? Hmm ? I digress…
So I was reading an article the other day about rape role play from a porn star… she was being absolutely slated for filming the scenes of this? Why?!? Because it’s bad… but her response was… I’d rather someone live out their fantasies with me and keep it in their room, than go out and actually do it to somebody (I’d agree with this) BUT the response threw me a little… which was along the lines of: People watch this again and again and then become hardened ( haha ?literally) to it. Basically saying that when you see something enough you don’t think it’s as bad.
Like the first time you see a dead body it’s horrifying, you’re probably sick, the second time, just as frightening but maybe not so much, third time, it starts to get easier.
I guess it’s the same with this porn situation.
They becomes so desensitised to it that maybe they don’t see it as something wrong.

I’m actually fighting my own battle with this argument because I actually see both sides of the story.
Although I’d much rather play it out in the bedroom ? or a quick snatch on the street ? I mean… it’s got to be realistic right…. ?

Anyways people… what’s your opinion on this?

Orgasm at the doctors surgery …

I swear to God I nearly had an orgasm in my doctor’s surgery today it was quite an experience!
So this morning I thought I better go to the doctors and just have a general check up because apparently when you turn 25 the doctors can tell from your vagina if you have any problems (smear test) I’m not 100% sure this is true, I think it’s just a way doctors get their kicks… but okay. I’ll accept the foreign object rummaging around in my vag.

So she tells me to jump up on the bed and to take off my knickers, bit forward of her I know… but hey I like to be a little submissive from time to time, so I jump up onto the bed and take my panties off and chuck my legs up 😉 for better insertion apparently … so with that she pulls out this anal stretcher, now I know that’s not what it’s called but that’s the only name I know for it, she covers this thing in lube puts her gloves on and the first thing that runs through my mind is “she’s blates seen my browser history”

She’s covered this thing is lube and inserts it, not in the same way I watched Christy Mack do to … ermmm what’s her name… the one on xnxx.com called … ermmm I’m digressing. So yeah she jams this thing in my vag and like a tyre jack starts pumping away at this thing… so now my vag is lubed up and wide. The only picture I’m seeing right now is a stuffed plucked chicken ready to go in the oven… although I know my vag is much more beautiful than that.

Anyways so now she starts adding implements to the equation, and having a good old rummage around with these extra sticks she found on the side. She looks at me from between my spread legs and says, I can’t find the entrance to your womb ( probably because the “man” destroyed it last night whilst we were off our tits on a little mushy trip) she carries on rummaging, pushing this implement all over the place. I’m not even joking, that G-spot she hit a hundred times… she even had a little giggle with me, she blates wanted me … she knewwww what she was up to ?

Basically long story cut short, I had my vagina probed and then I had to go home and furiously masturbate to get over my morning ordeal!

Photographers recently are getting right on my tits…

I have a little bit of a niggle about photographers at the moment I never really have that much bad to say about them but recently I’ve actually found more photographers thinking that they control you because they pay you. For me I can understand why they do think that way but I don’t think that’s really the fairway to look at something. At the end of the day you’re creating art so you collaborating with that person, okay granted they are paying me but they are paying because it’s Something that they want to create and They need a professional (myself) to do that for them. It could be their hobby and I am very aware of that and for me I actually don’t charge as much as I should to hobby photographers because I understand that not everyone can pay through the roof and I would rather be working every day than sitting on my arse doing fuck all.

I started this little blog with a completely different intention but as I am writing this it’s taken another turn not just to the fact that I’m annoyed with togs thinking because they pay you they can ask you to pose however they like and when you say “no, that’s not my levels” they get all arsehole-ish (yes that is a word) about it.

I’m actually getting pretty sick of how photographers actually shoot in general at the moment. I shoot at a lovely location last week and I genuinely felt as though the photographers just saw a piece a pussy in front of them. Not art, not a model, not a beautiful image. Just a wet pussy, because honestly that’s how they looked at me and treated me. If you don’t get that reference to “cunt” then seriously, why are you reading my blog… ?

I’ve honestly found it more and more often. The level of respect from photographer to models has just gone straight down this year!

 

My biggest confession yet!

For those of you that do keep up to date with my diary I posted a few weeks ago about a few certain people 2 boys and a girl. Casanova, Romeo and a girl.
Well that situation has completely fucking blown up hasn’t it!

Right lets recap- Casanova was the fuck boy, a self admitted fuck boy, my long term incredibly good friend (he still is) but he is no longer my fuck boy.
Romeo- I think I descried him as “without fail a full on 10/10 beautiful specimen of a man with an amazing personality, laid back, carefree….” I basically blew his horn from the word go. Not his dick, his ego. Although given the chance I probably would have blown that horn. He’s taken more of a permanent position on my life recently.
And the girl, well I still have the upmost respect for her but after the accusation in Ibiza that I has banged Romeo and not told her, I kinda found this more annoying as time has gone on, and mine and her friendship has flattened recently. Although still friends certainly not as good as we were.

At the time of the accusation Romeo and I certainly had not fucked, kissed….. nothing. Granted we always ended up the last two standing after a night out and curling in a ball on the sofa with eachother feeling sorry for ourselves, but nothing past that.
The weekend I got back from Ibiza, Romeo had been at some music festival and didn’t want to drive home soo he crashed at mine for a few days. WE had the conversation of “everyone’s saying we have so we might as well just do it” convo… which didn’t actually happen instead he pulled out the big guns, went down on me, made me fucking drench he face within seconds * YES SECONDS* stood up after, whipped his mouth, smirked and suggested we went for food…. Romeo just turned into an Eros, that boy ruined my soul with his tongue! <3

From this point onward, I’ve been in a trance.
And now its probably time for my biggest confession yet…. I think, I might just like this one.

Orgasming while having your prostate stimulated is the holy grail of orgasms

Now, I think the title speaks for itself here.

I am more than happy to openly talk about this and I do find that some men are too, well they don’t mind talking about girls arseholes but some become a little coy when talking about their own, but love a good finger, tongue or toy in their ass.

My actual point of this post is to find out why guys like it? I know why I like it but how do you guys even find out that you like it? Us girls never really got the experimental time for that, we kind of started to date or fuck someone who ended up shoving it our butts because their bf had seen it on some porn and thought he’d give it ago and believe he was a boss because he managed to last 3 seconds after putting it in… but for guys its been such a taboo thing, where did it all start for you guys!

So I’m trying to figure out what it is for men that’s got them into it? I mean we all know you have your prostate in your ass and giving that a little massage mid blow job is going to blow your fucking mind but how did that finger even get in there? From a girl randomly doing it to you? or you telling her to do it? HOW!
Because most men would punch you in the face if you went anywhere near their arsehole… you know what I think…

This isn’t the nineties. Every straight man should explore himself and overcome that homophobic stigma. Trust me orgasming while having your prostate stimulated is the holy grail of orgasms.

I think what I might actually be asking is how many men are actually open and happy about this. Because my past relationships have fluttered form punch to the throat if that thought even crossed my mind to pegging… there is absolutely no in-between when it comes to guys.

As I update my diary you’ll understand why I’m asking these questions 😉

 

I am the WORST admin EVER!

I am the worst admin ever but I now have my laptop back and I am back in full swing of the updates 😉

The fact that I haven’t updated this is so long sh0uld really tell you that I obviously have amazing news and I’ve clearly just been a very busy girl!!

Well yes and no… after my last holiday, I figured that I probably needed another one. All that drama…. sooo I went back to Ibiza with a friend 😉

Between the holiday and now its been work work work and play play play of course I will be filling you in on that with all the juicy details.

So apart from just shooting glamour I ventured into a new little realm of hair fetish, now you guys know I’m open to most things.. in fact… we haven’t yet found something that has sent me running, I digress, I wasn’t too sure how I was going to execute this one but apparently I did it quite well 😉
I actually really enjoyed it in fact, I can actually quite get to grips with it, there is something quite liberating about it.

I unfortunately didn’t have the hair length that was probably required but hey… lets take a look shall we… and then I’m going to go on to fingering bumholes etc, I know you guys love that…

I hope you like them!!!

Fuck Boys?! Who’s really the dumb ones?

Who’s really the dumb one?

This could turn into a huge rant or just a very well logically thought out entry….

Let’s talk about # fuckboys

Now I love a good fuck, boy, oh boy I do…. But this isn’t the fuck boys I’m talking about!

The fuck boys that don’t admit they are fuck boys are the fuck boys that fucking winding me up! ( looks like it’s going to be a rant)

Now if you are an admitted fuck boy, well done to you. Good for you boo. I like that. I respect that. But girls you need to actually listen to this shit! If he says to you
“Babe I Don’t want a relationship, with anyone, but I like seeing you I like what WE HAVE”
He genuinely does mean this, no doubt about it

For the girls that need this desiffered here you go:
He DOES NOT want a relationship, few different reasons: he doesn’t want the aggro, he’s seeing others, he plans to see others, generally doesn’t want to settle, other goals which women side track …
He probably does like seeing you; but you know when he’s not around all those other nights and you don’t hear from him? But when you’re with him it’s like tunnel vision? No one else matters, yeah.. Baby don’t be dumb.
Of course he likes what you have, he’s got pussy on tap?

BABE he literally means exactly what he says! Stop trying to change him! Focus on yourself!
If that’s what he says that’s what he means and that’s what he’s going to do, be a bad bitch, pull your shit together and listen to that fuck boy, build yourself up be strong, focus on your goals, smash them goals, get your booty in the gym, do some squats and stop being a mediocre bitch.

I think I just went from bitching about fuckboys to bitching about mediocre bitches?! Sorry y’all!!

Anyways fuck boys: If you want to be a fuck boy, be honest, lay it all out ( well done for those of you that do) fortunately I’m actually quite lucky with this, one of my fuckboys is an open book fuckboy and I love it.
From the minute I met him, he was honest, he didn’t want to date me it would ruin our friendship (the prime sentence for a fuck boy) but let’s be fair, do you think I really want to date? ??? darling, I just need my pussy eaten and one night stands are not my thing and his face is more than comfortable, but not all girls understand this.
You HAVE to be honest and make sure they 100% understand. You sit your little fuckboy ass down and you make sure they know this shit.
If you sit there and tell her, you don’t want to date but you wanna fuck and she won’t change you not wanting to date and if she doesn’t understand then you be a man and walk the fuck away mainly because she’s probably a fucking psycho if she doesn’t understand black and white and you’ll be saving yourself a fuck load of drama but also mainly because you wanna be a fuckboyboss. Take that reputation and own that shit, be a #fuckboy and everyone knows you’re a fuck boy but be one that tells it how it is! #fuckboyboss

This whole “a fuck boy is someone who pisses others off” yeah sure, why? Because they wanna fucking do that shit and they can’t.

Oh btw if you’re fugly, don’t even try and be a fuck boy mate, you’re just a cunt. STOP THAT

Anyways this was just a quick entry… But my main question was who’s really the dumb ones? Girls I’m afraid to say it’s probably us…

Let’s get logical, we find these guys who sweep us off our feet, we fall in love with their words and not their actions and we believe that they will change their mind, once they’ve already got what they want?

#fuckboygoals

#dontbeamediocrebitch